In our work lives, we sometimes find ourselves in a kind of wilderness. Perhaps we don’t know why we’re still doing what we’re doing, or we’re just exhausted with it, or more potently – we just can’t care anymore and have no more f***s to give.
This can be because of an untenable work situation or culture, a bad boss, an accumulation of compromises we’ve made that topple of their own weight, or a blinding realization that we are really not making a difference.
In my recruiting firm, my business partner Landa and I used to say this when we encountered someone in this wilderness stage: “She’s crossed over.” By this we meant that whatever the work situation was, it likely couldn’t be saved and it was time for this person to move on – to a new job, a new way of working, or maybe a new career or type of work altogether.
It can be really, really hard to see this for yourself, or to admit it. We invest so much of ourselves in our work that it can be incredibly painful to confront that we’re no longer doing what we want to be doing, or that we’re no longer where we want to be. We feel that we should keep going, even if there are diminishing returns, or fear of the unknown keeps us in place, settling for “the devil we know.”
What if, instead – you could take just a baby step toward opening up some space to see more clearly? Sometimes small adjustments can make as much difference as huge makeovers. Such as (a partial list):
Take a look at who you’re spending time with, in an honest way. Who truly fills your cup? Mindfully spend more time with those people.
Audit and edit your media consumption. Not necessarily to spend more or less time, but rather for what lifts you, enriches you, and fortifies you for your daily life.
Choose something new to learn or return to, perhaps a hobby or type of art or craft.
Listen to more music (personally, I recommend 20 minutes a day, while you are doing nothing else, just listening). Music is the best brain medicine.
Gather with other people who care about something in common, whether it’s subject matter, a cause, a performance, or perhaps a retreat.
In each of our coaching practices, Caryn Mirriam-Goldberg and I both have found that the biggest revelations can occur in the smallest spaces, and that we give ourselves huge gifts by lifting our eyes and opening our arms just a bit wider… even for just moments at a time.
Is there an area of your work life where you have disengaged or “crossed over?” Where can you make a bit of space for yourself? You might be amazed at what will come to you.
Consider joining Kathryn and Caryn for The Big Picture Retreat, Nov. 1-3, 2024 at Unity Village in Lee’s Summit, MO. In a small group (in a gorgeous setting), discover what’s knocking on the door of your life’s work right now, and dream how you might put a plan into action for the next year. We’ll also relax, have a lot of fun, and enjoy superb meals!
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